Phones

A Samsung Galaxy S25 with locked-down software that genuinely helps you cut distractions while keeping good hardware.

E-ink back that changes colour using no battery is cool, earning A tier despite not beating important features.

Impressively wrapped display but awkward to read and use, so a C tier, suited only to digital detox users.

A monolithic rugged phone with a bright camping light, projector, night vision and huge battery, earning A tier.

Uncomfortable square phone with a mediocre rotating camera, but great AI software and free internet, so B tier.

Impressive purse display effects, but impractical for battery and risky for a delicate folding screen, so D tier.

Swappable physical input modules are clever and satisfying, but the iPod-style module feels cheap, earning a B tier.

Technically impressive 4.9mm modular phone, but the modular idea is niche and he can't give it more than a B.

World-class software and Gemini features, but less powerful, worse for gaming and shorter on battery than rivals.

Repairable with a microSD slot, but the camera, battery and chipset are disappointing for $400.

A polished, fun mid-ranger that punches above its weight, though the regular 4a is better value.

Exceptional rear cameras and smarter software, but weak front camera, patchy apps and no Apple ecosystem made it unworkable as his main pho…

Stylish, privacy-focused phone with thoughtful software and Ubuntu dual boot, though the camera app and finish are rough.

Another cookie-cutter phone from the same supplier as Lava, disappointingly uninspired.

Soft screen, sloppy software and one real camera make it a no-show.

Keeps the headphone jack, microSD slot and great speakers, but the camera is less dependable than Samsung's.

Admirably repairable and sustainable, but dated, with weaker cameras and a slower chip than the Nothing.

Great screen, storage and chip for $316, but the camera lets it down.

The best rugged phone he has seen, with a polished ecosystem, though it is niche and loses to Oppo.

The most stale ultra phone he has seen, with boring design, software, display and cameras.

A rebadged Chinese phone sold in Turkey for roughly three times the price of the identical Lava.

The satellite mode really works, but the software and design feel rushed next to Crosscall's phone.

A useful alert button, but the software is laggy and everything feels budget.

Balanced, dependable and tied into a strong ecosystem, which he decided matters more to him than the Oppo's camera strengths.