Everything I've tested.

Best camera phone of the year, which he preferred over a real camera on holiday, but its battery is held back in Europe.

The e-ink display saves power and eye strain, but slow refresh makes apps painful and modern batteries reduce the benefit.

A genuinely impressive triple-fold design that makes foldables more useful, but it is fragile, heavy, very expensive and held back by dated…

Finds the smuggled North Korean phone disturbing, with a tracked intranet, licensed apps and automatic surveillance screenshots.

A dated North Korean budget phone with poor camera quality, useless extra lenses and Android 10 with no updates.

A North Korean flagship that costs close to $1,000 but looks and performs like a dated copy of a 2021 mid-range Huawei, with heavy censorsh…

Twenty of the 10 mph cars together still could not beat the single 100 mph car.

The single 100 mph RC car has so much traction that even 20 slower cars cannot pull it.

Smaller 13 Pro gets at least 30 minutes more screen time than the 12 Pro Max and shares the strong screen and cameras, but the notch cuts i…

A deliberately iterative phone whose camera system and many small refinements make it a surprisingly good, well-judged upgrade at an unchan…

Beautifully presented and heavy, but the speakers, camera and ZTE-derived software make it poor value at $5,400.

A hand-assembled $7,940 flip phone with a noisy hinge that closely resembles the ZTE Nubia Flip 2.

Weighty and luxurious in feel, but the low-resolution display and unreliable crown make it disappointing at $4,300.

A $6,300 luxury phone whose camera loses to a $1,000 iPhone and which is built on licensed ZTE software.

Designed to clear people out of the way and only slightly louder than the previous horn.

A much larger lung-powered horn that is far louder than the party blower.

Uses compressed air and is a lot louder, painful even with ear protection on.

The 10-cent party blower was the weakest horn and he called it terrible.

The loudest horn in the world, louder than a military jet takeoff and potentially ear-rupturing.

Combines two tones and is loud enough for truck drivers to hear on busy roads, though the sound is horrible.

Good-sounding, nice-looking headphones, but pricey and not updated since 2020, though they beat the fake.

Most recommendable $99 headphones, with huge battery life and satisfying physical controls, despite plastic build and only decent noise can…

A rebadged cheap Ukel phone with a clear interface and good support, but a weak display and a pricey subscription.

Cleaned the shoes to about 97% and he would use them from now on.