Everything I've tested.

A grown-up scented Play-Doh style dough that smells like brand new shoes.

He disliked this novelty pimple popping kit.

Novelty grass flip flops that he found very itchy.

The laptop he still uses daily, feeling far faster than Intel models, with a 1080p webcam though the notch is unnecessary.

Impressive for 1989 and surprisingly repairable with a great keyboard, but huge and absurdly expensive.

A playful, experimental and affordable laptop that introduced consumer Wi-Fi, and he wishes more laptops were this daring.

A massive jump from the Macintosh Portable, with a clever trackball placement and a much smaller body.

A big leap that felt much more pro, with a trackpad and see-through loading screen, though his unit died on camera.

An incremental update with longer battery life, newer ports and a 30% faster chip, but no big redesign.

A love-hate laptop: futuristic and fun with a huge trackpad, but the Touch Bar bugged out and few developers supported it.

Impressively thin with a nice Retina screen, but dropping all ports and fanless low-power chip made it unnecessary.

A night-and-day screen upgrade in a thin body, with a keyboard he thinks Apple peaked on.

Solid, bright and fast, the best-selling MacBook ever and the first proper MacBook design.

Metal-bodied, with a good display and slick keyboard, and the last Apple laptop with a latch.

A paradigm-changing thin laptop and one of Apple's top moments, with a multi-touch trackpad that felt intuitive.

A nostalgic plastic laptop that felt high-end and was the first fun computer he used.

The first Apple laptop with a metal body; sturdy and functional, starting to resemble the modern MacBook.

The fastest laptop in the world in 1997, and the Wall Street model felt high-end, though he wished for curvier edges.

A well-reviewed, no-gimmick Pro laptop that nailed the fundamentals, though the webcam was still poor.

Calls it the most extreme vacuum cleaner he has owned, praising its smart mapping, rug detection and a very capable dock.

He calls it the most intelligent phone camera he has seen, with standout night shooting and video thanks to a dedicated imaging chip.

Last year's model already had the best phone speakers on the market.

A ridiculous accessory with a built-in subwoofer that adds richness to audio and boosts benchmark performance.

Tiny enough to vanish in a pocket and surprisingly usable for web pages, but typing is fiddly and the camera is the weaker of the two.